Saturday, January 4, 2014

Happy New Year!

My baby is refusing to be born.  She's due on Monday, in her defense, but my daughter was born at 37 weeks so I already feel 3 weeks overdue.  I've tried all the self-inducing tricks, I ate two full pineapples, I'm taking walks constantly, I drink raspberry tea leaf all day, the doc did some membrane stripping on Monday (ouch), tried sex, I even pumped for 15 minutes today….nothin.  And when I say nothing, I mean barely any contractions and no other signs that this little girl wants to be anywhere but inside her warm and cozy uterus.  She needs to get moving soon or she's going to miss the visitors that drove all the way from PA to meet her.

I was swamped with jewelry orders last month, along with busy things going on at work and preparations for the holidays and this baby's arrival.  I've still been editing, but I didn't meet my goal of finishing this round of edits before the new year.  I got close, only 100 pages left, give or take a few, but I'm at the area of the book that needed the most improvement.  Some days I'll read the book and think 'this is exactly what I hoped it'd be' and other days I feel like it's awful.  It'll get done.  Right now I just feel like I'm in limbo…I keep expecting to go into labor, and when I don't, I over think how many things can go wrong, or how bad it's going to hurt, or how much sleep I'm not going to get in the next 6 months (wishful thinking).  Then my mind finds some peace and confidence for a minute or two, then she still doesn't come and it all starts again.  I wonder what stage I'll be at when I actually go into labor. If I ever go into labor.

Did I mention we call her Peanut Butter?  As goofy as it sounds, I'll probably start calling the two of them PB & J once she's here.

Today we took J and grandparents to the park.

Now I'm going to get ready to go grocery shopping and walk around a track (maybe hop a bit) to try and coax PB out while the husband goes to the gym.

I can't wait to be able to get real exercise again.  I miss going for runs (ones where my legs don't feel like they're carrying 50 lb weights) and feeling active.  I'm so sluggish and off balance.  

Ughh….any day now, please.

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