Already slacking.

I am sitting at work, trying to take a real lunch (because if I don't, I might end up going nuts this afternoon...this job is making me crazy). I was brushing my teeth this morning when I realized I already missed my second day of trying to motivate myself to write. If I can't even stay motivated to motivate myself (which takes less than five minutes a day) how am I ever going to finish a whole book? Well, what I originally thought of yesterday that I wanted to write in here was that if I ever do finish this book, I'll have to partially dedicate it to Scrivener...an awesome word document program on my Mac at home that has made writing 10 times more fun and easy for me. It helps me immensly with my organization process and I'm sure I wouldn't have even gotten as far as I am with this latest project if I hadn't found this program. I originally heard of it on a podcast I was listening to at the end of last year ("I should be writing" by Mir Lafferty). I will have to dedicate a few of my motivational notes to it as well because without my Mac here with me, I am having trouble giving my full attention over to writing about why I love the program so much.

I think one of the problems I'm having with motivating myself is the fact that my job and life are insanely stressful right at the moment. Being pregnant makes me tired all the time, being pregnant also makes it harmful for me to consume too much caffeine, so I need to get one cup in the morning of this necessary drug and then somehow make myself continue moving after work each evening with nothing but fumes. After cleaning (or neglecting to clean and laying like a lump on the couch all night), I never even crave writing like I did before I was pregnant and so stressed out with work. But....starting in August, I will be a part-time student again-taking two classes online-and I really want to finish this project before then. I have the ideas and outline and over a third written, so I know it's a realistic goal, but I just NEED to get myself back into it. Even with work...which I regard as my second priority when compared to my writing (my job is just what I do full time in order to pay the bills)...I need to keep writing.